I'm so proud of Bree, Paul & Me haha we actually got to pull it off (hah, well kinda) -Caresse's Surprise 18th Birthday Party @ Bj's, haha I guess I can say that all that stressing all three of us went through a while ago paid off? haha yes, It was all worth it...anything for the sweet Caresse of course, she deserved it [:
How do I describe my night in one word? hmmm...wonderful? haha, Yes my night was WONDERFUL (: It was fabulous being surrounded with such wonderful friends! hah, I don't even consider them friends anymore, They're all family to me... I had a lovely night with Caresse, Bree, Paul, Jennica, Luis, Allen, Shonna,Sylvie, Bert, John,Ben, Scott, Alexis, Kish, Sam, Bond, Irma & Her Bf (lol, sorry I keep forgetting his name >.<) Gabriel & Philip...aw, too bad Chiara wasn't there to celebrate with us ):
So to sum it all up...I had a great night, great food...NOTT (I hated what I ordered, stupid Paul jocked my first order!) It's so funny though, 'cause we both ended up picking the same order, which was so weird, haha but I guess thats what happens, heh GREAT MINDS THINK ALIKE! haha but anywho I definitely had great friends there :)
*SIGHS, everyone's growing up. everyone's getting/going somewhere...time flys by soo fast, next thing you know It'll be my turn (: ... NINE more months for me! I'm in no rush though, lol well not really...BUT I do wan't a tatoo now haha! I'm trying my best to make the most out of my senior year...even though it was already prettty lame to start with since all my senior loves graduated ): It's all good though I'm glad we all still hang out even outside of school.
So, my sister is leaving today at 9am. which is um 8 hours from now? well yeah she's going off to college as well, her packing has officially begun haha, It's 12:20 am & she's still not done packing. It's crazy. she has soo much stuff & a whole bunch of new stuff to bring with her, haha poor her. Honestly, I'm pretty bummed that she's leaving... the house will be so different, so empty & quiet without her. It's just the me, Leilani & my little brother now...which means I'm the eldest now and I have to step up & start acting like it. My parent's gave me a lecture on how I'm supposed to me more responsible & all these new responsibilites that I have to take care of and do, since Dearah isn't here to do them anymore. I feel like all of it is already starting to hit me. I feel like the whole 'Older Sister' or 'Ate' whatever you wanna call it, is starting to get to me. I'm not complaining It's just that it feels weird, 'cause Dearah is usually always there to do almost everything & help my parents around the house & stuff like that...It'll take some time for me to get used to. Yenno what I mean? haha, yeahhh so no more... little bratty girl status for me, hahaha. I have to "set a good example" from now on for my siblings. Hopefully, I get my act together and do a good job at it...hah, notice I said HOPEFULLY, let me just put that out there hahahaha!
I realized a lot of things about myself tonight, & I'm proud of myself, I can't say why or go into detail here, but yeah... I feel good right now. I'm so proud of myself, 'cause I'm doing the RIGHT THING for once in my life (:
I'm glad that I'm FINALLY able to move on from whatever happened in the past and just forget about it, and start over with some people, I'm happy with where I'm at right now, I'm not fully satisfied but it's enough satisfaction I need for now to keep me sane haha. I feel invincible right now, so no one ruin it for me okay? hah, thanks that would be greatly appreciated!
...and as for love bittersweet love, It's getting/going somewhere? hah, I have no idea where but I'm just going with the flow...It is what it is, and it will be what it wants to be. I honestly dont know...
Well goodnight/goodmorning loves, I'm going to rest now.
With Love, Hugs & Kisses,
-Melinda
"...and it slowly fades away"
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