Wednesday, September 24, 2008

"You simply can't make someone love you if they don't..."



Waking up this morning was such a dread. I didn't really have any plans today but I decided to be resourceful and productive today, but that didn't happen either. I WAS suppose to go jogging early in the morning & then go to the mall, but eh I got too lazy.


...Besides the facts of my day, lately I've been thinking alot about what belongs and what doesn't in my life. Do I really need a boyfriend? Do I need to do anything at all to be more content? Should I move out? I don't know. Yes. and I REALLY don't know.


I'm really trying to find a balance between what I need and what I want. I wish I was more capable of focusing on what I need more than what I want. I just seem to lack both...lately I seem to lack everything. The only solution really is to just start being more determined with what needs to be done... 'cause I seem to be careless when it comes to it. I seem to be care less with a lot of things lately, is that bad?

I'm so stressed out right now, you guys have no idea what so ever. I'm just soo overwhelmed with everything, with everyone...& especially the drama here and the chaos there. I mean my goodness. Am I a bad person? Is this why all this misery is slapping me in the face?

Oh I don't know, eff it...eff everything. I'm already depressed as it is. whatevers...I wish I can just say that to everything and to everyone ...whatever.whatever. WHATEVER!

Like I said in my last Blog..."We are the cause of our own misery by how we think of the world and ourselves."--you guys can quote me on that :)

What-ever, goodnight/goodmorning!


I HATE HOW EVERYTHING IS SO UNCERTAIN. UGH!


-AMA

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